MODEL
CUSTODY PROVISIONS (Rev. 1/98)
_____ County Family Court
The [father][mother]
shall have [sole][joint] custody of the child(ren) subject to
regular weekly contact with the [father][mother] as follows:
[Set forth days and hours of weekly contacts with
non-residential parent, e.g. Every other weekend from Friday
at 6:00 PM until Sunday at 6:00 PM]. In addition to the
foregoing:
1. The [father][mother] shall have the child(ren) on alternate
holidays, which shall include: New Years Day*, Martin Luther
King Day, Presidents' Day, Easter Sunday, Memorial Day,
Independence Day, Labor Day, Columbus Day, Veterans Day,
Thanksgiving Day and Christmas Day*. As to those holidays
which occur during the school year, the holiday shall be the
day on which the school district the child(ren) is/are
attending observes the holiday. The [father's][mother's]
holiday sequence shall begin with , 199 . It is the intent of
the court that neither parent will have the child(ren) for the
same holiday for two consecutive years. Contact on the above,
or any other single day holidays set forth below, shall
commence at 9:00 AM and end at 6:00 PM [exact time may vary
depending on the schedule of each parent - a specific time
should be set forth].
[DELETE CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEARS DAY IF USING PARAGRAPH #2
BELOW]
2. The parents
shall alternate the non-summer extended vacations observed by
the school district the child(ren) is/are attending; such
vacations shall include the December, mid-winter and spring
recesses. The parent who does not have the child(ren) for the
December recess, shall have the child(ren) from 6:00 PM on the
day school recesses for the holiday until 12:00 noon Christmas
Day. The parent who does have the child(ren) for the December
recess shall have the child(ren) from 12:00 noon on Christmas
Day until 12:00 noon on the day before school resumes. [exact
times may vary depending on the schedules of each parent - a
specific time should be set forth].
3. The [father][mother] shall be entitled to have the
child(ren) with [her][him] for ___ [consecutive][non-consecutive]
weeks during the summer vacation period observed by the school
district the child(ren) is/are attending; the parent entitled
to such summer vacation shall notify the other parent, in
writing, certified mail, return receipt requested, on or
before May 1st of each year, specifying the week(s) selected
for summer visitation.
4. The mother shall have the child(ren) on Mother's Day each
year and the father shall have the child(ren) on Father's Day
each year.
5. The mother shall have the child(ren) on her birthday each
year and the father shall have the child(ren) on his birthday
each year.
6. Each parent shall have complete access to all health care
records, information and providers concerning all matters
relating to the mental and physical well-being of the
child(ren); a copy of all health care information received by
one parent shall be provided to the other within 48 hours of
receipt; each parent, while the child(ren) is/are in his or
her care, shall inform the other of any illness, injury or
condition which confines a child to bed for more than three
days or which requires medical intervention; each parent shall
sign releases or other documents necessary and/or required to
permit the other to have access to health care information
and/or providers.
7. Each parent shall have complete access to all school
records and all personnel involved with the education of the
child(ren); a copy of all report cards, school bulletins and
schedules of events, PTA meetings and the like or any other
material received from any school the child(ren) is/are
attending shall be provided to the other parent within 48
hours of receipt; each parent shall sign releases or other
documents necessary and/or required to permit the other parent
to have full access to such educational records and/or
providers.
8. Each parent shall advise the other of any special events,
dinners, ball games, plays, recitals and the like in which the
child(ren) is/are involved and which parents may attend;
advice about such events shall be given by one parent to the
other within 48 hours of receipt.
9. Each parent shall encourage the free exercise of the
visitation/custodial rights of the other; neither parent shall
do any act or make any statement which would directly or
indirectly tend to defeat or make exercising
visitation/custodial rights of the other parent more
difficult; which would tend to disappoint the child(ren);
which is derogatory of the other parent; or, which would
discourage the child(ren) from contact with the other parent.
Neither parent shall allow, condone or encourage any other
person to engage in any conduct which is contrary to the above
provisions. In exercising custodial/visitation rights each
parent shall consider the wishes and plans of the child(ren).
10. Each parent shall arrive on time for any scheduled pick-up
or return of the child(ren); the child(ren) shall be provided
with clean, adequate and suitable clothing for any scheduled
visitation period and the same or comparable clothing shall be
returned at the conclusion of the visit.
11. Neither parent shall expose the child(ren) to any conduct
or activity which would endanger the physical, mental or moral
well-being of the child(ren).
12. Each parent shall keep the other advised of his/her
current address and telephone number; if a child is to be
outside the State of New York for any reason for a period in
excess of 72 hours, the parent allowing the child(ren) to be
at such location shall inform the other parent, in advance,
where the child will be and, when possible, the address and
telephone number where the child may be reached while outside
the State of New York.
13. During any period that the child(ren) is/are with one
parent, reasonable, peaceful and private telephone contact
between the child(ren) and the other parent shall be allowed
between the hours of 9:00 AM and 7:00 PM.
14. Each parent shall keep the other advised of the name and
telephone number of any day care provider used on a regular
basis or during a school vacation period.
15. Transportation to and from all visitation shall be the
[shared] responsibility of the [father][mother].
16. The terms of this order are based on the present residence
of the parents. Neither parent shall move more than 50 miles
from his/her current residence without first giving the other
parent at least 90 days prior notice, in writing. In any
event, if the contemplated move is in excess of 50 miles or
will significantly impair the visitation/custody rights
granted herein, prior court approval of such move shall be
obtained, unless both parents agree, in writing.
17. The "BILL OF RIGHTS FOR CHILDREN WHOSE PARENTS ARE
SEPARATED" attached hereto is made a part of this order and
both parents shall respect and comply with each of those
rights.
18. The [father][mother] shall have final decision making
authority regarding all major matters affecting the welfare of
the child(ren) including, but not limited to, matters of
health, education and religion.
NOTWITHSTANDING THE FOREGOING, both parents shall have the
right to participate in the decision making process in all
major, non-emergency matters affecting the welfare of the child(ren).
To insure that each parent continues to have informed and
meaningful input in the decision making process, prior to
making any non-emergency or non-day to day decision relating
to the welfare of the child(ren), the parent with final
decision making authority shall timely communicate [his][her]
proposal to the other parent, in writing, setting forth the
basis for the proposed determination and supplying any
material that may have been considered in formulating the
proposal. The other parent shall be given a reasonable
opportunity to respond, in writing, submitting comments and
alternate proposals, including any supplemental material for
consideration. Any final determination made by the parent with
final decision making authority shall be communicated to the
other parent, in writing, setting forth the specific basis for
rejecting all or part of any alternative proposed by the other
parent.
Use of the foregoing process is intended to encourage an
orderly, meaningful and peaceful exchange of information
between parents about matters of major importance affecting
their child(ren). The process is also intended to encourage
thoughtful consideration of alternatives advanced by both
parents and to minimize the temptation of the parent with
decision making authority to act in an arbitrary fashion.
19. The terms of this order shall remain in effect until
modified by this court which specifically retains jurisdiction
of this matter for the purpose of any such request for
modification.

BILL OF RIGHTS
FOR CHILDREN WHOSE
PARENTS ARE SEPARATED
1. THE RIGHT NOT TO BE ASKED TO "CHOOSE SIDES" BETWEEN THEIR
PARENTS.
2. THE RIGHT NOT TO BE TOLD THE DETAILS OF BITTER OR NASTY
LEGAL PROCEEDINGS GOING ON BETWEEN THEIR PARENTS.
3. THE RIGHT NOT TO BE TOLD "BAD THINGS" ABOUT THE OTHER
PARENT'S PERSONALITY OR CHARACTER.
4. THE RIGHT TO PRIVACY WHEN TALKING TO EITHER PARENT ON THE
TELEPHONE.
5. THE RIGHT NOT TO BE CROSS-EXAMINED BY ONE PARENT AFTER
SPENDING TIME WITH THE OTHER PARENT.
6. THE RIGHT NOT TO BE ASKED TO BE A MESSENGER FROM ONE PARENT
TO THE OTHER.
7. THE RIGHT NOT TO BE ASKED BY ONE PARENT TO TELL THE OTHER
PARENT UNTRUTHS.
8. THE RIGHT NOT TO BE USED AS A CONFIDANT REGARDING THE LEGAL
PROCEEDINGS BETWEEN THE PARENTS.
9. THE RIGHT TO EXPRESS FEELINGS, WHATEVER THOSE FEELINGS MAY
BE.
10. THE RIGHT TO CHOOSE NOT TO EXPRESS CERTAIN FEELINGS.
11. THE RIGHT TO BE PROTECTED FROM PARENTAL WARFARE.
12. THE RIGHT NOT TO BE MADE TO FEEL GUILTY FOR LOVING BOTH
PARENTS.

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